Their dance program said--
Someday, My Prince will come, but my Daddy will always be the King of my Heart!
Someday someone else will be their date to the ball, but may they always know how much their dad loves and cares for them!
Two Little Princesses
Every little girl wants to feel special. And I can't think of anything that would make her feel more special than a fancy night out with her dad. That's exactly why my husband took our twins to the Daddy's Little Princess Ball this weekend. Big sister did their hair and makeup and they felt beautiful! Dinner out and more dancing than their little feet could handle. Special memories to save up and treasure...
Texting Trumps Talking
This week I've been appreciating texting and the way it has helped my relationship with my teenage daughter. In fact, I'm not sure we could have navigated the middle and high school years without it! There are so many things to say and so many of them are better received in written form.
Mornings can be hard for us. Stress over getting up and out the door early doesn't lend itself to pleasant conversations. It's so nice when I see this after a less than ideal interaction before school.
Texting also allows us to discuss things that could easily escalate into a full blown fight if we were face to face. I feel like I can say no to requests easier over a text because there's an opportunity to write out an explanation and a chance to consider each other's words before responding. Curfews, for example...
Mornings can be hard for us. Stress over getting up and out the door early doesn't lend itself to pleasant conversations. It's so nice when I see this after a less than ideal interaction before school.
Much easier to negotiate like this than with whining, begging, and shouting...
Want to make a request that you know is not going to be well received? Try this...
Need to find out the dirt on a sibling? Maybe that new driver needs a little more instruction...
Last minute requests for school never get any easier...
Yes, texting can sometimes get a bad rap, but it certainly has provided a valuable tool for communication in the teenage years. It might seem impersonal, but there's a lot of our "voices" in there. I can "hear" her...
And can't every relationship benefit from another way to be heard?
Getting Fit
It seems like January inspires everyone to eat healthier and take better care of their bodies. Time to start new routines and make changes. We joined our local YMCA in November and I can see that the classes are much more crowded now that the new year is here.
Working out, a necessary evil that must regularly occur! I have no problem walking on a regular basis, but that's really the only exercise I enjoy. Now that I'm getting a little older though, I want to exercise in a way that builds muscle strength a few times a week. Lifting weights at home or while I watch TV? Just not going to happen. I'll let those weights sit there for an eternity, finding excuse after excuse not to pick them up. No, I definitely need external motivation. That's why we decided to join the Y. I really needed to have accountability and a reason to get there consistently. Class will start with or without me, so I'd better be there, and everyone in there will keep going whether I'm actually doing the work in class or not. Plus when you're paying a significant monthly fee, you're more motivated to actually take advantage of the services.
I've found that the best time for me to get it done is right after the kids walk out the door in the morning. If I wait around until a later class and start doing things around the house, I get less and less motivated to go. Also, making myself get dressed (including putting on sneakers!) before the kids walk out the door just seals the deal. I'm going. The first 15 minutes of a class are mentally the hardest. The classes go for an hour and that just sounds like such a long time! But, after 15 minutes and definitely after 30, my mood improves. By the time I've finished, I'm happy. Thrilled, even, to be done for at least two days. I give myself guilt-free permission to only go 3 times a week. Otherwise, I get burned out. Gotta have some kind of reward for going!
So...that's what's working for me right now. I think I even see some muscle developing in my arms! What works for you?
Working out, a necessary evil that must regularly occur! I have no problem walking on a regular basis, but that's really the only exercise I enjoy. Now that I'm getting a little older though, I want to exercise in a way that builds muscle strength a few times a week. Lifting weights at home or while I watch TV? Just not going to happen. I'll let those weights sit there for an eternity, finding excuse after excuse not to pick them up. No, I definitely need external motivation. That's why we decided to join the Y. I really needed to have accountability and a reason to get there consistently. Class will start with or without me, so I'd better be there, and everyone in there will keep going whether I'm actually doing the work in class or not. Plus when you're paying a significant monthly fee, you're more motivated to actually take advantage of the services.
I've found that the best time for me to get it done is right after the kids walk out the door in the morning. If I wait around until a later class and start doing things around the house, I get less and less motivated to go. Also, making myself get dressed (including putting on sneakers!) before the kids walk out the door just seals the deal. I'm going. The first 15 minutes of a class are mentally the hardest. The classes go for an hour and that just sounds like such a long time! But, after 15 minutes and definitely after 30, my mood improves. By the time I've finished, I'm happy. Thrilled, even, to be done for at least two days. I give myself guilt-free permission to only go 3 times a week. Otherwise, I get burned out. Gotta have some kind of reward for going!
So...that's what's working for me right now. I think I even see some muscle developing in my arms! What works for you?
Eighteen Candles
Today my oldest child turns 18. This is a day that I've both dreaded and anticipated since the day we brought her home. Obviously, I had an incredible amount of mommy hormones flowing through me, but I still remember lying with her on the bed listening to lullabies and tears starting to flow. Three days already gone! How could time already be moving so fast? I can remember thinking, we only have 18 years with her. That's not nearly enough time and how will I ever let go.
The years have indeed passed and I've continued to marvel at each stage. What a gift God has given me to raise my daughter and see her move from baby, to girl, to now young woman. There have been many days where mothering hasn't felt so magical, but my overall feeling when I look back is always one of awe and gratitude, full of an incredible love for her.
This is a big year for her, and for us. She'll graduate from high school and begin the college adventure. She will not live in our house full-time anymore and she'll have more parts of her life that are separate from us. Now that the time is approaching, I view it with both excitement and trepidation. I'm excited to see how her future will evolve and all that she'll become, while also wanting to hold onto the daughter I know today, right this minute.
Eighteen years. It's a milestone for both the child and the parents. It's a chance to reflect on all that goes into the parenting journey, all the hard work, sleepless nights, sacrifices, and sheer determination. It's also a chance to celebrate all the wonderful memories and moments that make life worthwhile, all the ways that having a child enriches your life and completes you in ways you never could have imagined.
Happy Birthday, my sweet girl! You are a treasure and a blessing in our lives!
Twenty Years Together
This weekend my husband and I celebrated our 20th wedding anniversary by going back to the town where we bought our first house and had our first child. It was amazing to be transported back in time like that. When we sold that house and moved to another state, our oldest child was just 15 months old and we had been married for three years. We were YOUNG! So young, too young to even know that we knew next to nothing about life. This weekend, as we walked the same streets where we'd pushed our first child in a stroller, I remembered the old feelings, the conversations, the dreams, the fears, the plans, all of it felt so close, so close that I could have just walked right back into that life and picked up right where I was at that time. Things I hadn't thought of in years came flowing back into my mind and I was overcome by waves of emotion and nostalgia.
It was easy to play, "What if?", wondering how our lives would be different today if we had made different decisions. At this point, I can see how easily our lives could have followed many different paths and even feel a sense of regret that we didn't get to see how some of those other phantom lives would have turned out too. There were so many things I would say to my younger self. People may have even said some of them to me at the time, but I wasn't paying attention. Mostly, I would have said to relax and savor these moments more, that the clichés are true, time really does fly and some day you'll miss this.
We were also struck by how much our world has changed since that time. No computers, no cell phones, no easy access to the happenings of distant family and friends. We had only one car, no cable, and little money. Now the little baby in that house is a senior in high school. The young parents have owned four more houses since then and have moved to two different states. They have five children and are busy with school, sports, and church activities. Four cars sit in the driveway. Media from cell phones, computers, and cable invade their lives at all hours of the day. The husband travels a lot and the wife juggles the kids and home.
But deep down, those young twenty-somethings are still the same people they were all those years ago. They still love each other and want to experience their lives together. Twenty years sounds like a long time to be married. We don't feel it though. We don't feel as wise as we thought we would. We're still learning how to love, to sacrifice, to support, to share. There have been hard times and times when we may have wished to quit, but those times are far outweighed by all the blessings, all the laughter, and all the experiences we've shared. I hope we're privileged to enjoy many more walks down memory lane together. May we look back on where we are right now in another 20 years with as much love and gratitude as we did this weekend.
It was easy to play, "What if?", wondering how our lives would be different today if we had made different decisions. At this point, I can see how easily our lives could have followed many different paths and even feel a sense of regret that we didn't get to see how some of those other phantom lives would have turned out too. There were so many things I would say to my younger self. People may have even said some of them to me at the time, but I wasn't paying attention. Mostly, I would have said to relax and savor these moments more, that the clichés are true, time really does fly and some day you'll miss this.
We were also struck by how much our world has changed since that time. No computers, no cell phones, no easy access to the happenings of distant family and friends. We had only one car, no cable, and little money. Now the little baby in that house is a senior in high school. The young parents have owned four more houses since then and have moved to two different states. They have five children and are busy with school, sports, and church activities. Four cars sit in the driveway. Media from cell phones, computers, and cable invade their lives at all hours of the day. The husband travels a lot and the wife juggles the kids and home.
But deep down, those young twenty-somethings are still the same people they were all those years ago. They still love each other and want to experience their lives together. Twenty years sounds like a long time to be married. We don't feel it though. We don't feel as wise as we thought we would. We're still learning how to love, to sacrifice, to support, to share. There have been hard times and times when we may have wished to quit, but those times are far outweighed by all the blessings, all the laughter, and all the experiences we've shared. I hope we're privileged to enjoy many more walks down memory lane together. May we look back on where we are right now in another 20 years with as much love and gratitude as we did this weekend.
Preparing for Christmas
Christmas is almost here and it seems like it's come so fast this year! I feel like I just put away last year's decorations. We got the tree up last weekend and I'm loving it! I went back to an artificial this year and I must say it was much easier to set up.
Christmas baking has been started and the annual frosting and decorating of cutouts is done. We made about 100 this year and have about a third left a week later. They'd probably all be gone, but I froze some and have been rationing them out!
I went on an afternoon of Christmas home tours last Saturday that really inspired some Christmas spirit. It was fun seeing new ways to decorate for the holidays!
Holly the Elf and her sidekick Peppermint Kitty have rejoined the family. The girls love to find her each morning even though they're long past believing in Santa and his elves.
This year seems a little more subdued as far as shopping and holiday obligations. We only have one school program to attend and just a few fun get-togethers with family and friends. It's nice keeping it more simple and having time to enjoy the season.
Christmas baking has been started and the annual frosting and decorating of cutouts is done. We made about 100 this year and have about a third left a week later. They'd probably all be gone, but I froze some and have been rationing them out!
I went on an afternoon of Christmas home tours last Saturday that really inspired some Christmas spirit. It was fun seeing new ways to decorate for the holidays!
Holly the Elf and her sidekick Peppermint Kitty have rejoined the family. The girls love to find her each morning even though they're long past believing in Santa and his elves.
This year seems a little more subdued as far as shopping and holiday obligations. We only have one school program to attend and just a few fun get-togethers with family and friends. It's nice keeping it more simple and having time to enjoy the season.
Out of Sight, Out of Mind
Currently, I'm hiding ice cream, chocolate, cookies and raspberries, as well as chapstick, make up wipes, make up remover, facewash, and various items of clothing, including socks and a sweater. Unless I hide these things, they disappear, taken into the great unknown by my kids. If I ever do see my missing things again, they're usually used up and worn out, not at all like they were before.
The problem with hiding things is that I forget where I put them. Then I can't find them either!
Eye make up remover. I can make a bottle last several weeks, maybe even a few months. My teenage daughter, on the other hand, can go through one in a couple weeks. Then she takes mine. I don't like having my eyes all wet, with mascara running down my face, while I run around trying to find where she's put my stuff. And when I do finally find it, it's down to almost nothing.
Scented lotion. I have a bottle by my bed. This is a risky move. The last time I had a bottle there I got a sweet request to borrow some. Being the generous mother I am, I agreed. I meant, you can use it this one time. I failed to take into account that allowing a kid borrow something once now means they own it. Pretty soon I found that bottle with no more than a teaspoonful left in it.
Sometimes I get overly confident. This happened recently with my make up wipes. I was tired of hiding them and thought maybe they'd be okay left out a couple times. Maybe I was being paranoid they would disappear. Bad move. That was the last I saw of them. They are nowhere to be found. Vanished into thin air because no one is admitting to taking them...
Chapstick. I've offered to buy every kid their own. Do you know how long they can keep track of their own chapstick? About two seconds. So my chapstick becomes a breeding ground for every cold and flu virus known to man! It's gotten so bad that I now have to keep two chapsticks in my purse. One for the community and one (hidden, of course) for me.
Food. Some of you might be wondering why I have to hide food. Am I denying my children nourishment? Not at all, they get plenty! It's just a reality that if something good is in sight, they will eat it. They won't think about saving any for anyone else. And let's face it, most of the time, kids really don't even appreciate mommy treats. I mean they're just as happy with Hershey as Godiva. My boys inhale their food without tasting it. They're not stopping to savor anything.
My brother in law posted a picture on Facebook of my sister's closet this week. In between the sweaters on the top shelf was a big bag of chocolate. He wrote that he's sure she just has it there for safe keeping. Ah, right...
What are you hiding from little eyes and hands today?
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